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Photo copyright:Liz Young

Joe was glad of the work, for the income it had brought in. He had written from the heart, when the Department of Health had contacted his agency to tender for the commercial. Writing the script had forced him to address what had happened with Adele. Yes superficially it had been the booze and cigarettes which had ended her life early. Dying from a heart attack at forty, it was just not right.

He recalled all the party’s they had attended, before he got jealous, then the arguments had started. He knew that stress ┬áhad been the real culprit.

Tea Break time for the writer

Tea Break time for the writer.

This Post Has 43 Comments

  1. neilmacdon

    A lovely trail of breadcrumbs to the answer

    1. Michael Humphris

      love your comment. Thank you so much.

  2. rochellewisoff

    Dear Michael,

    One of the perks or drawbacks of being a writer is coming face to face with a few unpleasantries. Nicely done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    1. Michael Humphris

      Thank you. Mike

  3. Iain Kelly

    Captured the lesson about ‘write what you know’ well, and the truths that can emerge from doing that. Nicely done.

    1. Michael Humphris

      That’s a kind comment, thank you.

  4. granonine

    Brrrrr. Now I need a cup of hot coffee!

    1. Michael Humphris

      Sorry he was a grim character.

  5. Liz Young

    That story has a sting hidden in the tail. Well done.

    1. Michael Humphris

      Thank you Liz.

  6. Sandra

    Nicely done. You deserve that cup of tea.

    1. Michael Humphris

      I needed it to feed the muse. I do love my cafe visits. Thank you

  7. Kecia Sparlin

    Yet…he’ll still profit by blaming the cigarettes and booze in the ad? There are layers to your story. Well done.

  8. Dale

    Nothing like having to face one’s part in the other’s demise… well done, Michael.

  9. Alicia Jamtaas

    Oh, I do like where you took the prompt.

  10. wmqcolby

    I want to hear more, Mike. The is great start for a short story, maybe.

    Way to go!

    1. FabricatingFiction

      I agree so much more to know!

      1. Michael Humphris

        That is the frustration of flash fiction. He was immature to start with – whilst she was blocked by her family from achieving what she desired. There I have given away to much already

        1. FabricatingFiction

          It’s great to hear more

          1. Michael Humphris

            [Sometimes] I find the comment section that follows a piece of flash fiction is just fascinating, particularly when the comments draw attention to a area within the writing matter that I had no realised was there. And on occasions I find the story subject just wants to say more.

    2. Michael Humphris

      I am pleased that this piece of flash fiction worked, thank you for your kind comment.

  11. draliman

    Quite a burden to live with, whether his actions contributed to her death or not.

    1. Michael Humphris

      That is right and is how I saw things as I wrote this piece of flash fiction.

  12. Life Lessons of a Dog Lover

    I’m taking a contrary position. I loved the introspection and coming to terms with what happened but I don’t think he should shoulder responsibility for her death.

    1. Michael Humphris

      In some ways you are right, for there where challenging family dynamics within her upbringing.

  13. Rowena

    Cause of death is such an interesting thing. They write down heart attack, when there was more than likely a smorgasbord of contributing factors. Chocolate cake, beer, arguments…the list goes on.
    I am poised with a decaf cup of tea and should be asleep but the house is blissfully quiet after the rabble has one to sleep. I can be my own person and I cherish this time a bit too much.

    1. Michael Humphris

      [Your opening line is a story in its self] There is nothing wrong with cherishing me time, I do love having family around and company visiting – but I also need quite a bit of me time, time to reflect and write – and have Chocolate cake and a mug of tea.

      1. Rowena

        I’ve been talking to a few people about striving for balance today and that’s what I’m also working towards with intimacy and solitude. Like you I also need a lot of time to write, read etc, although I do much of that at night with the family around. I’m rather non-stop but there is that quiet, solitary end of the day, which I savour. BTW we’re nibbling away on a chocolate crunchie Easter bunny with my decaf tea at the moment. Yum!

        1. Michael Humphris

          It’s good to be happy, I had to stop the chocolate, I was nibbling to fast.

          1. Rowena

            Michael, last night my parents came up for my daughter’s birthday and we cracked open this special chocolate we’d bought in Tassie: https://anvers-chocolate.com.au/dark-fortunato-no-4-peru/
            It was a beautiful chocolate. My husband found it a little bitter, which surprised me as I usually have a sweeter tooth than him and I loved it.
            Hope you’ve had a good week. I missed Friday Fictioneers this week what with my daughter’s birthday and losing track of the week.
            xx Rowena

          2. Michael Humphris

            That sounds like a great chocolate. I enjoy trying different types of honey, next week I will be tasting a honey from north Germany.

  14. gahlearner

    It’s not easy to face the truth when you’ve found excuses for too long. Atl least he’s ready to do that now. Great story.

  15. plaridel

    it’s time for him to move on and not dwell on the past.

    1. Michael Humphris

      That is true, and he will in time.

  16. Michael Wynn

    There’s so much in this, great piece of writing. Whether he should bear the burden or not, he will. Great emotional writing

    1. Michael Humphris

      He will bear the burden but writing about it will help him. Thank you for the lovely comment.

  17. yarnspinnerr

    I like this political piece. Health is truly a political industry now. I loved the many layers to this one.

    1. Michael Humphris

      That is a great comment, thank you. Mike

  18. Clare Hempstead

    Whilst he obviously didn’t treat her well, blaming himself for her death is probably a bit harsh!

    1. Michael Humphris

      That is true, writing about what happened will be cathartic for him

  19. Inside the Mind of Isadora

    Oh those damn cigarettes and the drink topped with high stress … that will kill you.
    Great story, Michael. I liked the build up.
    Isadora

    1. Michael Humphris

      I am pleased you enjoyed the build up, it was great to get your feedback. Thank you.

  20. lingeringvisions by Dawn

    I hope he learns to move on.

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