Quietly waiting for:

Copyright Ted Strutz

Copyright Ted Strutz

I was so cold despite all the colours of the rainbow that clung to the back wall. Even the piano seemed frozen in time, lid up, candles half used, wax solidified like pillars supporting the arches of a cathedral. Half empty bottles lined the bar, each label seemed to tell its own story. Lost in amongst the grander bottles was a small gold coloured bottle of barley wine. I was home. Even the bar tender appeared lost. Dropping a pound on the bar I called for my tipple, before the flames of hell grew around me.

This Post Has 40 Comments

  1. neilmacdon

    I’m not sure I understand where the flames of hell come in, but I liked the timeless quality

    1. Michael Humphris

      I saw the ghost like figure behind the bar, my drinker has taken his last drink, and hell is beckoning.

      1. neilmacdon

        Ahh. Thanks, Michael

  2. Lynn Love

    Ooh, lovely description, giving the place a mystical, supernatural feeling. I dread to think where that bottle will take him … Great atmosphere, Michael ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. Michael Humphris

      Thank you for your very kind comments.

      1. Lynn Love

        My pleasure, Michael ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. rochellewisoff

    Dear Michael,

    Wonderful descriptions. Perhaps he should turn and leave rather than having his tipple. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    1. Michael Humphris

      Thank you Rochelle He’s unfortunately had one tipple to many and died

  4. ceayr

    Excellent.
    That bar sounds like a couple I know in the east end of Glasgow!

  5. Snow's Fissures and Fractures

    What a story…to find a home where everyone else is lost. Beautifully done.

  6. wmqcolby

    Wow. Stay out of bars, period. ๐Ÿ˜€

    A knockout, Mike. Well done!

  7. Sandra

    A bottle of barley wine as your last drink. What a way to go! Very colourful tale, Michael.

  8. TraceyDelaplainMD.com

    Make mine a Chardonney.

    1. Michael Humphris

      Each one to their own.

  9. Keith's Ramblings

    They have a drink in China called firewater. I wonder if it’smade with barley wine?

    Annie RIP – my short story

  10. gahlearner

    I’ve never heard of barley wine. We know the stuff as beer… Great atmosphere and description.

    1. Michael Humphris

      In the 1960s my supply of barley wine came from a small brewer, it was a strong ale, quite potent stuff really,

      1. gahlearner

        Thanks for the info, that’s fascinating. I looked it up, too. Technically it is beer, but with much more alcohol. I’ve learned something new, thank you. ๐Ÿ™‚

  11. spicedmullings

    Leaves you wondering…

    1. Michael Humphris

      I did not get the story to quite flow in the manner that I had hoped for.

      1. spicedmullings

        I guess the word limit curtailing your flight into heights of imagination!

        1. Michael Humphris

          True yet the word limit also stops me drifting on for ever

  12. Clare Hempstead

    Ohh that’s a nasty end!

    1. Michael Humphris

      I am hoping that he gets a reprieve

  13. rgayer55

    I’ll admit it. I got lost. Reading the comments helped. Otherwise, I would have never figured it out.

    1. Michael Humphris

      Sorry, you are right, I was drifting, sometimes I forget that I am putting my writing out there to be read. Mike

    2. seekeroftruthweb

      I had to read the comments to get it as well!

  14. lingeringvisions by Dawn

    Wow, what way to go!

    1. Michael Humphris

      It certainly might be, for I knew his drinking companion very well.

      1. lingeringvisions by Dawn

        Yikes!

        1. Michael Humphris

          Yikes is right.

  15. The Mom Who Runs

    Greetings, MH!
    Very vivid. I wasn’t quite sure where MC was headed with that drink (or why) but had a great time following him to the end! ๐Ÿ™‚
    TMWR

    1. Michael Humphris

      Greetings mom who runs, even I am not to sure what he is about to face. Mike

    2. Michael Humphris

      I am not sure even I or he knew where he was heading that day

  16. seekeroftruthweb

    Gives new meaning to something to die for! Could the speaker actually be in purgatory or in some limbo awaiting reincarnation.(I guess it all depends on your religion.)

    1. Michael Humphris

      That would be one interpretation or it might be his last drink before going into a battle which he can not win and he knows it. I had several different endings in mind, thank you for commenting mike

  17. jellico84

    Nothing like home! Love the image you created!

    1. Michael Humphris

      Thank you so much. Mike

  18. patriciaruthsusan

    Now I’m wondering why he’s on a way station to hell. This would be a great hook for a longer story. I hope he’s just dreaming. Good writing, Mike. ๐Ÿ™‚ — Suzanne

    1. Michael Humphris

      Now you have got me thinking, about how I can add this character into one of my longer story’s.

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