[How do I tell my child about the rain becoming radioactive?]
‘Well it started with an election darling.’
‘What happened ‘
‘They seeded the clouds, so that the rain would fall on the desert.
Other nations complained and a fight started.
Remember you learnt about the nuclear winter darling.
Why we now reside deep under ground.’
‘Will I ever feel the rain’
‘No darling it is too radioactive.
But I wanted you to see a reflection in a rain puddle as I once did.
It’s time to sleep now darling.’
‘But I don’t like the sleeping pod. It is so noisy, so many people talking.’
‘We dream talk darling to pass the time, until the surface of the earth is safe to visit again.’
‘Is the puddle a dream Mummy.’
‘No darling it is in your memory, from long ago.’
Footnote
I would be glad of any comments on the format that I have used in trying to put across what I saw as a piece of dream talk.
I thought I was returning to familiar haunts, but it was not so, for the…
This Post Has 7 Comments
Chilling! Radioactive puddles is a frightening thought Mike! So sad that it all started because of an election and because of trying to play God with the rain clouds. Great story!
I hope this isn’t a glimpse of what’s in store for the inhabitants of Planet Earth. Living deep in the Earth doesn’t appeal to me at all! Interesting dialogue, Michael, and it’s very clear who is speaking this week. The only suggestion I would make is not to use characters’ names in every line. We wouldn’t do that in an everyday conversation.
Thank you Millie – I really appreciate this feedback, you are right about my over zealous use of defining the character’s. I felt it at the time of drafting the story, but getting the story out took over.
I have penned quite a few underground stories, and as a child liked exploring tunnels, perhaps I was once a ‘mole’.
Chilling! Radioactive puddles is a frightening thought Mike! So sad that it all started because of an election and because of trying to play God with the rain clouds. Great story!
Thank you PJ. I wanted to write a topical story – but fictional in nature.
Well done Mike!
Great take! Enjoyed reading it in this format!
Thank you for your kind comments
I hope this isn’t a glimpse of what’s in store for the inhabitants of Planet Earth. Living deep in the Earth doesn’t appeal to me at all! Interesting dialogue, Michael, and it’s very clear who is speaking this week. The only suggestion I would make is not to use characters’ names in every line. We wouldn’t do that in an everyday conversation.
Thank you Millie – I really appreciate this feedback, you are right about my over zealous use of defining the character’s. I felt it at the time of drafting the story, but getting the story out took over.
I have penned quite a few underground stories, and as a child liked exploring tunnels, perhaps I was once a ‘mole’.