A cry for help.

Photo copyright: Gah Learner

Photo copyright: Gah Learner

Broadmoor.

Brother
I need your help, how was I to know the guy had a thin skull.
I saw the watch he was wearing and believed that it was mine.
I hit him hard, and he fell, then they say I hit him again and again.
I got the watch.

I rest watching the moon, the staff here say that it makes me worse.
I know that there are three guys sitting waiting for me, like garden gnomes.
I will die if you don’t help, they are waiting for me, from across the divide.

Footnote:
Full of cold and wide awake at 5am, what can you do, but write.

Michael Humphris.

This Post Has 26 Comments

  1. neilmacdon

    And you wrote well., I really liked this

    1. Michael Humphris

      Thank you Neil, I am pleased the letter came over Ok.

  2. Dale

    A little stronger than he thought he was…
    Good one.

    1. Michael Humphris

      Far to strong, glad you enjoyed this story.

  3. theministryofshrawleywalks

    So if he gets out he will die. Is he a werewolf?

    1. Michael Humphris

      Hi there, I had not seen him as a werewolf… I saw him more as a mental ill man, but

  4. lisarey1990

    A wonderful concept. A really good read.

    1. Michael Humphris

      So glad it read ok, as I was unsure about the formatting.

  5. Jacob C. Edwards

    oh wow, that first sentence hits like a brick wall. I’m digging the dark energy, expertly crafted

    1. Michael Humphris

      Thank you Jacob, I am glad it worked, as the piece was written as an experiment.

  6. theministryofshrawleywalks

    I know but that’s why these little tales are so cool, there’s a certain amount of interpretation involved.

  7. Keith's Ramblings

    Excellent – you should catch colds more often!

    Click to read my FriFic tale!

    1. Michael Humphris

      Your comment cheered me up no end, but no thank you Keith,

  8. jillyfunnell

    Twisted thought processes going on here. Seems as though the writer kind of blames his victim for having a thin skull. Real psychopathic detachment.

    1. Michael Humphris

      He certainly does, to the piont of insanity

  9. Sandra

    You did better than I would with a streaming cold at 5 am in the morning. Get well soon.

  10. JoHawkTheWriter

    He should have pick a guy with a thicker skull. Nicely done. I would not have done this well so early in the morning.

    1. Michael Humphris

      Thank you for such kind feedback,

  11. rochellewisoff

    Dear Michael,

    Your cold at 5 am is our gain. I felt the guy’s desperation but something tells me his brother should leave him where he is.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    1. Michael Humphris

      Thank you so much Rochelle,

  12. Sarah Ann

    I don’t imagine the brother is able to offer much help. The three waiting across the divide will be waiting wherever your narrator attempts to run to.

    1. Michael Humphris

      You are right on all counts, Sarah.

  13. gahlearner

    He completely lacks insight into his own strength and into what is wrong or right, he must be severely ill, mentally. I admire your skill to write with a cold, and such a good story, too. When I’m sick, I’m just miserable and can’t think beyond that. Get well soon.

    1. Michael Humphris

      You are right; he is in Broadmoor Hospital, a hospital for the mentally ill who are also considered a major threat to public safety… Writing helps distract me from being miserable, but I am also taking plenty of medication for my cold. Otherwise there would be no writing for me.

  14. Dahlia

    Wonderful piece Michael especially liked the opening lines

    1. Michael Humphris

      It was an amalgamation of ideas and half remembered event. Glad you it worked

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