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Unknown

Photo curtsy of T S
Photo curtsy of T Strutz

“What is it Simon”. “I’m not sure Rod”.

S. “Could it be one of those mythical dragons that dad keeps going on about”.

R. “Might be, anyway we can’t eat it, so it’s not much use to us”.

S. “It could be turned into a shelter Rod, you know like in the old days when people lived in houses. I think that I might have liked to live in a house”.

R. “I know brother”.

S “Let’s looking inside”.

R “Phew something’s beaten us to it. It stinks”.

S “You think dragons stinked Rod”.

R “How’d do I know”.

Footnote: How you interpret this is up to you dear reader. For myself I heard and saw two ragamuffin’s in a post apocalyptic worlds

Visiting Berlin
Visiting Berlin
This Post Has 62 Comments
  1. Hi Michael,
    Great story here. After reading your comment about the flow, I re-read it and noticed quite a few changes I would make to the punctuation.
    Firstly, unless this is intended to be a play, I’d take out the letters at the start of each line.
    Secondly, I pick out a sentence and reviewed the punctuation but you and others might not agree with my take and that’s fine.
    “It could be turned into a shelter, Rod. You know, like in the old days when people lived in houses. I think that I might have liked to live in a house.”
    You’ll notice too the the full stop goes before the quotation marks.
    I am a Grammar Nazi.
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

    1. Rowena, I was pleased to see an alternative sentence construction. During my English classes in junior school, due to a local shortage of teachers we had French and American teachers. My English punctuation is well and truly scrabbled

      1. Having a French person teaching you English Grammar could be a real problem. I can’t quite think off the top of my head whether their word order is different but I think so. When I was in Year 6 at primary school, we did what felt like a Grammar intensive and I really struggled and then later on what with modern writing styles, punctuation went out the door and you just wrote from that deep reservoir within and didn’t need to constrain it with Grammar. However, over the last ten years, I’ve worked on it a bit. A good rule of thumb is to add a comma where you would take a breath in speech. It’s become more intuitive for me these days and what sounds right. I’m also something of an amateur violinist from a family of musicians so that also influences my writing. It has to sound right. Hope that helps a little.
        Best wishes,
        Rowena

        1. I am jealous, music is the stuff of magic… I grew up in a rural area with strong accents and no stopping to breath! So it seems that I am a right mixture, but I get by. Many teachers tried to straighten me out, at first I must have been something of a nightmare for most of them

          1. You can also have too much polish. So, there’s a fine line and I think everyone likes to hear something which is close to their own voice.

  2. An intriguing and unique story, I like it a lot. Let them think it’s a dragon, that keeps them away. I think it might be a badger or some other species from that family, like a marten or weasel. They stink. A lot.

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